Are You In Sales? What to say to your boss when you don’t meet your “quota!”

salesmanThis was forwarded to me tonight…

It’s “R” rated, but if you’re a person working in corporate sales – or have a boss who thinks you do nothing all day to meet the “bottom line”…

This one’s for you!

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The Real Politics of Hate…

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Almost every day, I try to catch Chris Matthews on “Hardball” , Ed Schultz on the “Ed Show” – both on MSNBC – and Bill O’Reilly on Fox.

For whatever reason, the MSNBC guys are absolutely foaming at the mouth over Glenn Beck’s “rally” in Washington over the weekend. While Matthews legs don’t tingle when he hears Beck speak, he devoted the first 15 minutes of his show on Tuesday into completely ripping Glenn Beck apart. After listening to him rant spin everything he thinks we need to know about Beck, I couldn’t take it anymore. The bottom line is that poor Chris is just astounded that stupid Glenn as well as his stupid followers kick his ass in the ratings every day…must be very frustrating for a smug lib to get his lunch eaten every single day by a Mormon of all people.

Next, we have Mr. Ed.

First of all, there is no doubt in my mind that this guy was a bully in high school – I can just see him and his big fat head shaking down kids for their lunch money.

Well, Mr. Ed came completely unglued today and promised to expose Beck for the “fraud” that Mr. Ed thinks he is. For 15 minutes, he ranted, he foamed at the mouth, ranted, raved and foamed some more…but never got to, well, “exposing” Beck.

The reason for his ire?

Glenn Beck pointed out on his radio show that Ed Schultz is an angry liberal.

And Ed Schultz spent the entire first 15 minutes proving it.

Again, what we have here is a complete problem of envy. The “smart guys” on the left are completely aghast that Sarah Palin, Glenn Beck, and Bill O’Reilly are completely overwhelming their message.

The bottom line?

There’s three “Americas”…the East Coast elites, the West Coast Libs, and the 90% of us in the middle who get up every day, go to work,  and try to make our own way without any government interference.

The left is finished in November, but they’ll be back. Because the right will do something stupid again, as they always do.

Meanwhile, The “Reverend” Al Sharpton is ticked off because Beck horned in on “our day.” So, whites need to be more racially sensitive but are stepping over the line when they celebrate Martin Luther King? Really?

In the end, I think guys like the “Rev” keep their power by pandering to their base: if African-Americans aren’t feeling down-trodden or bad about being black, the Rev will be more than happy to remind them why they should. This guy will say anything to keep himself on the news circuit and to stoke the flames of racial division because that’s how he makes a living. I can say that I’ve listened to this guy for years and have never heard one single profound statement from him – ever. I think he’s still wishing it was 1963 and he was hanging out with MLK in the “good old days.” He’s looking for a fight that just isn’t there anymore, so he has to pick a fight instead.

In the end, there will always be some kind of racial tension in the world…they’ve been at it for 3,000 years in the Middle East and it’s still just as bad as it always has been.

Conservative or Liberal, we’re in trouble.

We’re going to hell in a hurry…one party is using a go-cart, and the other is using a jet. But they’re both taking us to the same place: financial ruin.

Who said that?

Glenn Beck. And, he’s right.

Some advice to Glenn Beck: convert to Islam…they won’t be able to touch you after that!

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The Pepsi Classic – An Intro

logo_optimizedIt is so hard for me to believe that after 60 years of incredible bowling history in Erie that there’s just one “scratch’ league left.

Just in case you don’t know, most bowling leagues are handicapped so that a 150-average bowler can compete against a 220-average bowler. To make it simple, most leagues would give the lower average 80% of the difference, which in this case would mean the 150 guy would get to add 56 pins to his or her score when he bowled against the 220 guy.

Of course, I think this works great when you’re bowling in a mixed league or with kids. But with a bunch of guys that average over 200? No way!

If you can’t run with the big dogs, stay on the porch.

I usually get killed by the big dogs, but once in a while I do make them weep. And it ain’t because they had to add something to my score – it’s because I beat ‘em straight up. And that’s worth the price of admission. Even if it only happens a few times a year.

More to come as we get underway in just eight days.

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It’s Bowling Season!

lakewood_lanes_01_smallWell…

After 5 long years, I decided to go back to one of my favorite things in the world…bowling.

I had to quit 5 years ago due to working second shift, and I haven’t really bowled more than 5 games in the last 5 years…so last night I decided to go throw a few practice games at Rolling Meadows. Since I’ll be bowling in a “scratch” league – all 200+ averages – I decided I really don’t want to embarrass myself next Wednesday night.

Despite almost falling over on my first shot, I rolled 208, 155, 215 and 208. Not too bad, but there’s still some work to be done before next week. My back hurts and my thumb has a scab which are both signs of really bad timing…so there’s a few things to iron out mainly because I’m old now!

I’ll be bowling in Erie’s only “scratch” league called the “Pepsi Classic” on Wednesday nights at Westway Lanes in Girard. We only have two guys on a team, and we bowl two two-game matches every night.

These guys are really good – the top average in the league is around 235. One lasting memory from my last season there was watching Greg Ebner roll a 300 game…after congratulating him, I asked him if that was his first 300.

“It’s my 23rd,” he said.

Gulp.

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Passing Your Knowledge To The Next Generation

ktd_1966I knew that the Tool & Die trade was going downhill fast around the year 2000, because among other things, I stopped getting calls from kids looking to start an apprenticeship.

The apprenticeship program was such a wonderful way for hundreds of years of knowledge and experience to be passed from one generation to the next. For four full years – overtime didn’t count – you received 8,000 hours of training from skilled craftsmen who, for the most part, wanted you to succeed.

During my apprenticeship at Anson Tools & Gages in Erie, every single hour that I spent on every machine was recorded so they would know when it was time to move me to the next area. The State set the guidelines on how much time we were supposed to get in a variety of areas, such as: milling, grinding, EDM, drill press, layout work, polishing, and hand work like filing and assembly.

In the end, you walked away with an incredible education taught to you by some pretty demanding – and sometimes grouchy – incredibly talented craftsmen.

How far could an apprentice go? Well, take a look at this photo below from 1956 at my Uncle Ed’s tool & die shop, Kerner Tool & Die Company…

When my Dad passed away in 1969, he was replaced by two young guys named Bill Hilbert and Joe Duscka…both went on to to employ thousands of people in Erie county over the next 30 years. I actually worked for Amos Newman at Tetra Tool back in the 80’s – my last “job” before starting my own shop – and he was just one of the best guys you could have ever met. When he passed away in the early 1990’s, I felt as bad as I did when my own father died. Now, that’s a testimonial to a great boss.

How good of a toolmaker was my Dad? Well, let’s look at all of the great things that both Mr. Hilbert and Mr. Duscka went on to accomplish in their business careers… besides training them, it took both of them to replace Fritz Kerner at Kerner Tool & Die. Not too shabby.

ktd_entrepreneurs

A few days ago, I was looking at all of the tools that I’ve accumulated during the last 30 years…I mentioned to my boss that when the day comes that I lock up my toolboxes for the last time, I’ll be walking out the door with at least three decades of experience that will be gone forever, because I have no one to share it with.

Now…that’s a shame, isn’t it?

In the end, I believe that there will always be room in the world for talented craftsmen that can work with their hands…in this age of automation,  computer programs, and computerized machinery that can supposedly “take the place” of skilled labor, I can honestly say that someone still needs to know what the hell is going on.

And it’s usually the poor guy who has to assemble something created by a bunch of geniuses with engineering degrees who knows what they “meant to say” when they designed it. So…we just fix their problems as we go. I see it every day – computer generated engineering drawings that are just plain bad.

Eventually, the day is coming – within 10 years – where these poor engineers aren’t going to have guys like me and the the rest of the great tool makers out there to cover them and fix their mistakes.

Nothing’s going to fit together, and – worse yet – there won’t be anyone around to tell them why.

Every engineering student should be forced to spend at least one year on the “other side” before finishing their degree.

You want to design buildings? Go work on a construction site for a year.

You want to design bridges? Go build them for a year.

You get the picture, right? How can you “engineer” something that you’ve never even touched?

I’m getting old…and I just had to say it. The good news is that there’s a million other guys out there that would agree with me 1000 percent. We just don’t matter that much any more, because we’re “old fashioned.”

American manufacturing is going to be in big trouble, as the last generation’s knowledge is being completely ignored…and if you’ve ever sent an important letter out with a major “typo” in it, then maybe you’ll understand that computers can’t do everything. If a simple spell-check program can’t work every time, imagine what looms ahead in the world of manufacturing when we eliminate the human element.

And that’s my two cents tonight.

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Things That Go On While You’re Sleeping!

bobcat_small

I’ve never done it, but a lot of folks like to put a motion-triggered camera next to their feeders or watering cans to see what shows up when they’re not around.

Ya never know what could show up…

Sometimes, I even amaze myself at what I post!

texas_water2

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GLEE – The Erie Rehearsals Continue!

DSCF9987_smallI took a ride out to Long’s School of Dance again tonight to watch rehearsal #3 for the upcoming “GLEE Flash Mob” that’s coming to Erie soon.

Everyone’s working really hard – and they’re getting better every night!

This is starting to look like a lot of fun…but I can’t film it and dance in it unless somebody gets me a “sweatband cam.”

Here’s some video from tonight’s rehearsal, which includes a short interview with Long’s instructor Vanessa Smylie who explains how this all came about and how you can still join in on the fun.

Enjoy!

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Letting Go Of the Past…It’s Hard, But Ya Just Gotta Do It

Kerner Tool & DieIt took me a few weeks, but tonight I finally loaded up 300 pounds of old documents from my old businesses to take to the local “Shred-X” company on Monday…

It’s kind of hard to look at the accumulation of 10 years of your business life, and let it go…old sales reports, cash-flow projections, and accounts receivables and payables, just to name a few.

I’ve had a feeling for a few months that this “old stuff” was holding me back somehow, and I knew that it was going to painful to sort through all of it…but it had to be done.

In the end, I reduced 8 banker boxes down to 1 single plastic tub of some of the stuff that my kids might like to see some day: photos, personal letters to clients, and a few forms that we used to quote new work.

Good-bye to Kerner Tool & Die once and for all – and “hello” to the next chapter!

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How I Almost Got in Super-Big Trouble With The Secret Service!

deckel_smallIt’s hard to believe, but when I started my first shop in 1991 having a computer was a pretty big deal. I remember when we bought our first “engineering” computer with a whopping 40 megs of memory! Back then, each meg cost $40…imagine having $1,600 invested in a computer today with only 40 megs of memory – I think Windows uses more than that just to install it today!

Anyway, back then we did our “3-D” work with very sophisticated German-made duplicators called “Deckles.” At on time back in the mid-90’s, I kept 3 Deckles running 12 hours every single day building toy molds for Little Tikes. Little Tikes supplied us with the 3-d patterns, and we in turn duplicated them into steel to make injection molds for their parts.

As time went on,  it got to the point where I could pretty much copy anything, and the word got around that I was pretty good at it and pretty inexpensive.

One day, a couple of guys showed up with an old, worn-out coining die and asked me if I could make them a new die by tracing the old one. Hmmm…

It’s hard to turn down work, but the old die was just too worn out to make a decent copy from. I explained to them that if the pattern is fuzzy, the “new” die will be fuzzy also…you’ll just get an exact copy of a worn-out die and get the same results.

Thank-God that I couldn’t do this job. Apparently, after they left my shop they decided to go with what they had and started stamping these coins out in the back room of their used car lot!

A few months later, they were all on the front page of the Erie paper for being arrested by the Secret Service for running a counterfeit racket.

In the end, anything that has monetary value – slot machine tokens, car wash tokens, and probably even coupons in the paper – are considered as cash by the Treasury Department and the Secret Service doesn’t like to see any “copies” floating around!

For some reason, I’ve kept the coin they brought in that day  for almost 20 years – you can clearly see “Atlantic City” on it!

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“GLEE” Comes To Erie!

I’m still trying to sort out the details, but appears that someone associated with the Fox Network’s hit show “Glee” has decided that Erie would be a great place to launch another “Flash Mob.”

glee_01So, what the heck is a “Glee Flash Mob?”

Imagine yourself at a busy airport or mall, and having a few hundred of your fellow travelers or shoppers break out into a completely choreographed dance routine. It’s pretty cool!

Of course, my Queen just HAD to get involved. While the details are a secret, I did stop by to watch them rehearse today at Long’s School of Dance in Millcreek…it was their second rehearsal, and it looks like a blast!

I’ll be going back on Monday for another rehearsal, and I’ll try to get an interview with whoever is in charge of this production in order to bring you more details, so stay tuned for more.

Here’s a few videos…the first one is the “finished product,” done by some Ohio State students. The second video is of today’s rehearsal in Erie.

Enjoy!

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